This is no surprise to those that know me. I grew up listening to dad talk about how so many things were done wrong by those surrounding us. Complaining was normal to me. It took me 25+ years to realize complaining wasn’t helping anyone.
Negativity fever is so strong and easy to get we don’t realize it controls our lives. It starts with a tiny justified burst of frustration, evolves to daily complaints and ends with a chronic case of victim mentality and finger pointing.
Here’s how I sound with the negative fever:
- He doesn’t know what he’s talking about.
- There’s no point to even try.
- This file is a piece of crap.
- Why is he leaving early with all this work to do.
- That won’t work because…
- Why can’t you just do it like this
When I have the fever I end up sounding like I have all the answers and the world is just out to get me.
What I got from all these negativity?
- Everlasting stress and frustration
- Solitude – the more I complained the less people wanted to be around me.
- Bad reputation – complainers don’t get their good ideas heard.
- Lack of career progress – whiners don’t get more responsibility.
- Lack of productivity and emotional balance
Finding a cure
After reaching a personal low, I was forced to reflect on my ways. Below are some medicines I use to combat this disease.
- What I’m going to do about it?
- This question forces me to decide if I’m going to take action or not. If the answer is no, then I’m just wasting energy.
- Is it something I can control?
- If I can’t effect change, there’s no need to get frustrated about progress, all I can do is offer an idea to the person responsible and let he/she decide what to do with it.
- Limit it to a few minutes
- It’s okay to express frustration every now and then, but it’s good to limit it to a short rant and move on to action.
- Look for the Good Stuff
- Pick out what’s good of an idea and improve on it.
What tactics do you use to avoid this fever?