“I’m Stuck” is the theme of the past month and I thought it would be nice to share my story. I have indirectly referred to this in the posts “Leaving vs. Going To Something” and “Turnover Begins With Disappointment”
The tears started flowing as I said “I don’t have a future here” to my leader, Maximus, and his leader, Apollo. (not their real names)
That was a few years ago, and let me tell you, I believed it. I was stuck. Or so I thought.
Today, I play that tape in my mind and laugh at how silly it must have sounded and looked to Maximus and Apollo. The laugh also comes from recognizing I was at a much lower level of awareness.
So, what made me feel and think I had no future? The story I told myself.
- What makes you think you are stuck in the first place?
- What’s the evidence?
- Would it hold up in court?
Here is some of the evidence:
- I stopped taking actuarial exams. Some people considered this an example of a lower quality of actuary.
- Most of my ideas were getting ignored and categorized as “whining.”
- My visa prevented me from trying a different job.
- I was doing what I considered unimportant work.
- I wasn’t busy or challenged enough.
My focus was on the things I was missing out. But who said the things I was missing out where going to take me where I wanted to go?
Thus, the first step to getting unstuck is challenging our evidence by comparing it to our description of where we want to go.
Being stuck implies we know exactly where we want to go or who we want to be. If we don’t know, we are just wasting energy with worry, fears, and doubts.
How are you stuck? What observations are you using to make this claim?